Caring, Confidence and Connecting are crucial for change. You probably know that, but as you face job search or other change, think about them in your own life. Each plays an integral role in achieving successful change.
Caring
When Rusty (not his real name) retires early, he flails miserably the first year. At age 55, he feels like a failure, thinking his career is over. With his retirement checks and investments, he could be comfortable, but his family life is in shambles.
His wife explodes when she returns from her job. “What have you been doing all day?” she roars. His teenage daughter’s hair glows shocking pink, while his son, the older of the two, excels in sports. None of them think Dad is worth two cents, as he hides in the garage, working on his hotrod. He begins to focus on the children’s issues, rather than finding a new career. Life becomes unbearable, before desperation forces his action.
If you are facing change, take control of the situation. Age 55 is not old. Do what you can and leave the other mess for later. Family issues may mire you in misery, rather than improving the situation.
Realize the world won’t end if you don’t watch all of your kid’s sports events. Let the daughter alone unless, grades drop and she changes crowds. Tell the family you care but must be passionate about finding a new job.
Confidence
Confidence comes through carefully analyzing your assets and liabilities. What do you bring to the job or other change? How are you unique? How do you cope with your liabilities?
You know you should be confident but the roller coaster is inevitable. Going through any change creates emotional upheaval. Do not be surprised by your rapid pulse on the way to an interview or doctor’s appointment. Recognize your personal anger, doubt, and sadness. Moving forward helps level the stress, returning your confidence.
Does your wife know how many contacts you made yesterday to follow up with recruiters? Keep accurate records, as you are in sales (selling yourself). Knowing how many phone calls, in person contacts and interviews helps you stay on track, plus you may share the information with incredulous relatives! By planning the change, rather than riding the bumps in the road, confidence returns.
Maybe you aren’t working hard enough. Listen to the complaints and if they have merit, correct your behavior. One phone call a day to an employer or possible customer is certainly not enough. Staying behind the computer constantly is not healthy. You will gain self-respect and new energy with continuous improvement. Recognize, however, you may have to push yourself hard when you move out of the office chair into a less comfortable spot.
Connecting
Connecting is networking. Whether it is online or in person, do it! Job leads come in surprising doses. Sitting next to someone at a Lions Club meeting may provide the lead you need to sell your product, which is you. Singing in the church choir may give you emotional support and respite from your crazy home life. Talking to your Uncle Ed in Seattle may not seem like networking, but he may have valuable contacts for your agony.
After a careful examination of his assets and liabilities, Rusty started looking for a job related to cars. He joined a Corvette club, meeting new people with connections to after market for automobiles. A new friend suggested he talk with a start up where Rusty’s background in Information Technology would be helpful to the organization. He talked to the start up. Not a fit. Another member convinced Rusty to sell cars. “No way,” thought Rusty. “I was an executive! I don’t want to do that.” But friends kept pushing him. He interviewed with a Chevy dealer. Yes, it would be commission, but he would meet new people. He had to get out of the house.
Much to Rusty’s surprise, he loves the sales job and customers love him. The agency gave him excellent training. He’s making money and his confidence radiates. He and his family are happier and healthier with his new endeavor.
Facing Change
So, go have coffee with a friend. Ask for creative ideas. Take care of your family by analyzing what is real. Your confidence will grow stronger and your transition, shorter. Change is rarely easy. And change is continuous.
Change, whether it’s a job change, moving to a new community or getting a new dog in the family, involves the three C’s. You need to care about the process or project, build confidence with enough analysis and connect with the right people to make it happen.
“Continuous effort-not strength and intelligence-is the key to unlocking our potential.”
Winston Churchill